If I could write a song, I would’ve drowned my frustrations while tapping away on my cajon. Since musicality is not one of my talents, there is simply nothing else to do but write.
Last night in class, my professor was explaining to us why it’s better to use the active voice over the passive. His examples were “I love you” and “You are loved by me.” Obviously, the former is better. He then talks about “definiteness.”
The word lingers in my head. Definiteness. Kinda like “assurance.”
Lately, all I ever wanted from everything is assurance. That it will be fine, it will work out, that it is worth something in the future.
Truth be told, I used to be the type who was spontaneous enough with feelings. Predicting outcomes was the last thing on my mind. But the need to be so sure comes with age, I guess. Because as we grow older, the tolerance for rejection is lower. “No” is not an answer.
Right now I want so many things, but with this thing called “assurance,” am just here, holding back.