This is not an allusion to the song by Jesse McCartney.
This week, I was very surprised to read Claud‘s post, and I am really happy to have done something to make her appreciate. She told me not to ask why, and even as I still wonder what I have done, I am honored and thankful that I have done something… inspiring? I cannot be sure about the verb. It’s the first adjective that came to mind with the verb appreciate, you get the drift.
Yesterday, I felt like tearing up when I saw one of my closest friends in college post this status on Facebook. Check it out below:
A true friend doesn’t care when you are broke, being a bitch, what you weigh, if your house is a mess, what you drive, about your past, or if your family is filled with crazy people. Your conversations pick up where they left off, even if it has been months ( or even years) apart. They love you for who you are. Repost if you have at least one true friend. They will know who they are.
I immediately Liked it, but commented that I’m not sure whether I should like it or not. She then replied that if I were a true friend to her, I would. She was right. But it made me thin about all the other friendships I have that somewhat flushed down the toilet.
Establishing friendship is easy. It sets off with common interests, being in a particular place, or strange moments. To be more specific, friends can be found in school, the workplace, and if you like to go out, you’d randomly meet a couple more. You chat, find out some quirks once in a while, and spend time, laughter, tears, embarrassing moments together.
Maintaining close ties with them is another thing. The thing with friends, as stated in that status, is that “Your conversations pick up where they left off, even if it has been months (or even years) apart.” Somehow, that isn’t always the case. Distance can either make or break relationships. The time spent can either be for or against you as the person’s threshold for understanding will determine your luck.
Calling someone a friend might be one-sided, given the circumstances. And it’s a sad reality. Imagine all the memories going down the drain. Friendship, unlike a romantic relationship, goes beyond the present and the future. You have to consider all three—past, present and the future.
Thinking about it is a heartbreaking thought. I’m the kind of person who would remove earphones just to listen to endless rants and worries, and success stories. You’d know I consider you a good friend if I’d gladly share what’s left of my value meal if you’re still hungry (even if the value meal itself is not enough for my own consumption). I would offer my time and efforts just so you could talk to your crush or get a glimpse of him. I would support all fangirlisms, regardless of the fact that you’re bordering on obsession. I’d even cheer for you if you suddenly appear on TV (even if you won’t actually get to hear me—hi Anne D!). I’d rack up my brains for all the tech specs before you purchase your dream gadget, and give you helpful links to maximize your new toy. I’d accompany you to the department store to buy long term food storage containers. But in the event that we don’t frequently see each other, I will always try my best to keep in touch and reply (that is, if there are no technological barriers like running out of credits, no signal, no Internet connection, to name a few). And even if your phone doesn’t ring, at some point or another, the thought of you surfaced in my head.
I won’t say I am a perfect friend. I’m not always there physically because I have other things to attend to. My deadline/output-driven work can get stressful at times. I enjoy me-time, I’m not really an extrovert. These are just some of the things that probably make me less sociable than what is required (if there is ever such a requirement, I believe otherwise).
I realize that I fall short on some occasions, but based on my understanding of this relationship concept, this entails understanding, forgiveness and acceptance. As with all things, it takes work and effort. And meeting halfway.
Acknowledging these doesn’t change the fact that I really feel bad. I have feelings too, just so you know.